Sunday, July 17, 2011

True Muslims

True Muslims are strong in their belief and in their adherence to good manners, yet they never accept compromises when it comes to their faith. If anyone came to him and asked for something, he would give it to him or her or at least respond with kind words. His good attitude extended to everyone, and he was like a father to others. The people who gathered around him felt that they were truly equal, yet distinguished only by their level of taqwa (piety and fear of Allah). They learned to be humble, respectful of the elderly, compassionate toward the young, mindful of the needy, and generous with the strangers.

There are other characteristics that made the Prophet deserve Allah's praise. Almighty Allah says:

"...." (Al-Qalam 68:4)
These characteristics involve the following manners:
• He never looked for anyone's faults.
• He never tended to be argumentative.
• He never scorned anyone.
• He never disgraced anyone.
• He never talked too much.
• He never concerned himself with matters that were not of his business.

The Prophet never said anything unless it was for the sake of Allah. When he spoke, the people around him would listen attentively. They would speak only when he was silent. They never argued with one another in his presence. They would smile at whatever he smiled at. They would be impressed by whatever impressed him.

He used to be patient with those strangers who might have been harsh in their requests or questions. (His Companions used to ask those strangers to speak gently.) He never interrupted anyone who was speaking; he would wait until the person indicated that he or she had finished.

He was skilful in softening others' hearts and in showing them — through his kind words and sincere deeds — the way to winning people's love and admiration.

Aishah narrated that he used to be cautious of the bad and evil people. Nevertheless, he would speak gently to them and treat them well, not because he feared them, but because he was setting an example for his followers on how to deal with violent and vicious people. Such people should be treated with gentleness and caution so as not to stir the evil in them. The Prophet once told `A'ishah:

"O Aishah, the worst of people is the one whom people avoid [or are gentle toward] because they fear his [or her] slander." (Al-Bukhari and Muslim)

True Muslims should follow in the footsteps of their Prophet and imitate his dealings with all people. If those people are good, this will help them accept the message of Islam. If they are bad, they will at least view this message in neutral terms and we will avoid their harm.

Mother passed away Part2

Azan subuh was at 5.45 am. I went to my local surau Pajar for Subuh prayers.
After prayers, I told Kamal that please announce to Surau people that my mother just passed away. Surau jamaah came to the house at 6.15 am.

Meanwhile, I had to do some preparation for my mother's burial. Firstly, I asked my brother & sister to call & inform everyone concerned of the passing of mother.
Datuk Abdul Rahman (Equinas CEO @ my cousin) volunteered to be my "driver". Not easy being driven by a CEO.

Second, I went to the Police station to "certify" that my mother has passed away.

Then off to Masjid Bulat. I knew the people there and they said "khariat kematian" for ahli Qariah is ready. Van jenazah, bilik urusan jenazah + all the necessary items & tukang mandi & membaca talkin is ready. I told him, I will take everything except tukang mandi. My own aunt will "mandi" my mother. That was mother's wish.

Lastly, off to Bukit Kiara Muslim Cemetary (BKMC) for burial arrangements. Firstly, they did NOT allow my mother to be buried at Kiara as my mother's address is in Selangor. But, imam at one of the KL mosque did contact BKMC and they agreed to give permit to my mother. RM 300.00 was the fee (+ money to penggali2 kubur)

I came back to house at 8am. People were arriving from all over the place. My office-mates started coming. I was touched. I cannot mention everyone that came. They were plenty. I told the audience that the plan is:-

1. From morning until 11.15 am the jenazah is at home
2. After 11.15 am, the jenazah is being "mandi & kafan" at the masjid Bulat
3. After Zuhor prayers will be Solat Jenazah
4. After Solat Jenazah, the burial will be at Bukit Kiara Muslim Cemetary until 3.30pm

Datuk Rahman asked me to lead majlis tahlil at 9am, which I obliged. Peple never stopped coming (& going)

Exactly 11.15am, we carried the jenazah to Masjid. I told my 2 sisters, my eldest daughter and my wife to be with my aunt in the bilik jenazah. All of them must take part in the "mandi & kafan"

By 12.30pm, the jenazah is ready. We last saw my mother, before she was covered completley at 12.30 pm. Everybody kissed her for the last time.

1.20pm Zuhor and immediately after Zuhor, solat Jenazah. I lead the Solat Jenazah.... Alhamdulillah there were many people doing the solat jenazah. Many office-mates were there.

1.50pm me & brother went in the Jenazah van to BKMC. Me & brother received mother at the liang lahad before we started to bury her. Talkin was done by Ustaz Salleh. I cannot control my crying..

By 3.15pm, we poured water & flower at the kubur...

I have done my best. Mandi, kafan, solat & kebumi my mother. Now starts the constant doa for my mother.

Before going back home, I dropped by at a dear friend of mine's grave (arwah Zul). It is very near mother's grave.

Bonda, kembalilah kepada Allah dengan hati yg tenang... Sehingga kita berjumpa di sana kelak.

To ALL my friends, thank you so much for everything. Please forgive my mother..

Friday, July 8, 2011

My mother passed away..

I am writing of the last moments of my mother's life.

Me and family knew that my mother is dying. We are all aware of her deteriorating health.

I,as the eldest son, must show my strenght so that the family members are being guided to give the best for mother.

In term of spiritual, my mother can recite "La ila ha illallah, Muhammad rasulullah" in early Jun. By 3rd week of Jun, she could only say "La ila ha illallah". By end Jun it became "Allah" and then by 4th Jul, she died.

Early Jun, she could stand by her own. By 3rd week of Jun, she just lie down. But end Jun, she could barely speak and slipped in semi-coma.

We could feel that she is nearing her time, and we could not do anything.. We just leave it to Allah.

On Sunday 3 Jul, I went to Puchong, to fetch 14 Tahfiz students to my house. Each of them recited 2 Juzu' each, with me having to cover 2 Juzu' to complete 30 Quran Juzu'. They gave me Juzu' 14 & 15. Praise be to Allah... Alhamdulillah, we covered the whole Quran.

In the evening, she became so weak, she could barely opened her eyes. I just whisper "Allah" to her...


After Isya', mother's breathing became irregular. I can sense that she is struggling to breath. Zaidah (youngest sister) recited the whole Al-Baqarah to her. She just lied down sleeping. I took a rest, watching Wimbledon Final between Djokovic and Nadal.

Everyday me, Zaidah & Faisal (my brother) took turns to be by her bedside. Zaidah took the 1st shift from Isya' until 1am. Faisal took from 1.00am until 4.30am. This is because he usually sleeps at around 4am everyday, so taking the mid-night shift is like second nature to him.

I took the last lap, from 4.30 am until 8.00am when the nurse and Zaidah will start to clean her up.

That nite, Zaidah was so tired that she slept at 11pm. I was beside my mother from 11pm until 2.30am. Faisal came back home to take over from 2.30am until 6am.

In my last "shift", I recited Surah Hud to her. This Surah mentioned a lot about Prophets. So, I took time to compile many stories regarding Prophets from Adam until Isa. Allah mentioned that All Prophets were being challenged by Allah. They have to bring people to worship Allah. But the end result, it is Allah who determines the outcome. Surely, it applies to us too. We make effort to the best of our ability. But the outcome, we leave it to ALLAH. Allah knows best.

At 5am, Faisal woke me up, saying mak was not breathing anymore. I shooked her for response- No response. I checked her breathing- no breathing. I checked her pulse- no pulse. Her body was still hot, so she must have passed away very recently.

I began to wake everyone in the house. I also asked to wake up my aunt's family, who happens to live next door. They all started crying!

A few minutes later Aunty came, panicked & said that we have to call a certified doctor to "certify" that mother is dead. I knew that if the above 3 things happened, the person is already dead from my First Aid Course. We cannot even give her CPR.

But, I just politely asked my brother Faisal to go to the nearest 24hour clinic, to get the doctor to "certify". Doctor came and examined my mother at 5.30am. She wrote on her paper, that my mother has passed away at 5.30 am.

I waited for Subuh. I managed to do 2 rakaat Tahajjud & 1 rakaat witir. I cried..

Innalillah hiwainna ila hirajiun.